http://www.myspace.com/alucardhellsting
is the subject of this article. Or you can click on the pic above.
Page Name: Alucard and Mistic Stella Vixen Forever
Type of Page: Personality Selling
Page Grade: A
NOW THIS IS A MYSPACE! We start our Lovecraftean journey by basking in the post-adolescent angst that is the Grim Reaper. Yes, look at how you cannot see his face under his cloak...it could be anyone under that cloak. It could even be....ALUCARD! The creator of one of the finest myspace pages I have ever seen. I mean this guy is letting you know, right out front, no ifs ands or buts, that he is fucking crazy. I congratulate you, Vixens, a job well done. Now to the nitty-gritty.
Perhaps one of my favorite points of the page was that it is not exactly clear who the page is for! Is it for Alucard? or Mistic Stella? They imply that it is both - but LOOK AT THE PICTURE - it is only...Alucard. Is Mistic Stella some sort of Norman Bates personality that is haunting the myspace safegrounds? Or is it simply the name for his Dungeons and Dragons level 6 druid princess? I ponder this often.
Another fantastic portion of this page is in the "Interests" section. Alucard (or Mistic Stella) speak in the royal "we"! - "
ALUCARD IS HIS OWN HERO! Now that is fucking bad ass. And he only tells us that just moments after expressing his opinion on the written word.
Well, I could go on and on about this page. It embodies the truly terrible in all of us. Some of you might question my score of A, and I understand that - this is after all, bad emo poetry. But it is the bad that makes it good, my fellow readers (or non-reader's in Alucard's case), and I stand by my grade.
You like drinking blood? Or have a myspace you want me to review? Email me at rateyourmyspace@hotmail.com
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